Do You still love me?

PS 36:7
“How precious is Your lovingkindness, O God!
Therefore, the children of men put their trust under the shadow of Your wings.”

Being married is a great blessing. It is the greatest blessing that the Father has given us, because in marriage we discover so many truths about God’s passion and love for us as His bride.

Marriage is also not without its own challenges and in this also so many lessons that can be learned if we are open to it.

Jacques and myself have been married for just over 10 years and I can safely say that I have been blessed with a husband that understands forgiveness and love like nobody that I have ever met. I know that he loves me even when I make the biggest mistakes, but like everything else in life our marriage also has to endure so many different challenges. Recently we have been enduring a few such challenges and somewhere in my heart I lost sight of his love for me. This caused me to take offense when offense was not given and to push him away and not being able to feel his love for me where I normally feel safe. My husband’s love is where I normally find comfort and strength to endure anything that life can throw at me but when I remove myself from his love and acceptance, I find myself lost and alone and without courage to face anything. When I choose to believe that he doesn’t love me or choose not to forgive him and remain in anger then I place myself in a place where I cannot see his love for me, and I separate myself from his strength to fight alongside me. Instead I find myself fighting against the very one meant to be there to defend me.

It is only when I choose to remember that he is not my enemy and if I can let go of my own pride and embrace his love and believe in His love for me that I can be his bride and find safety and strength in his love and care for me. He can then again fight alongside me and give courage and strength when I fall short.

Like so many things in our marriage when I think about this, I can clearly see how God is trying to teach me His character and heart.
You see the enemy is determined to separate us from the love of God. He uses so many things to try and convince us that we are not covered by God’s love. He deceives us and makes us question our bridegroom and His ability to fight for us. It is a very subtle attack and we don’t even notice that he is doing it. When we face ongoing challenges in life, unanswered prayers, disappointments and situations that we do not understand with every such a situation there is a possibility that the enemy is sneaking a little doubt in our hearts that God has abandoned us or that He does not love us. Without realising it we start to move away little by little from his protection and care for us. Without realising it our hearts become cold and we lose faith in the very One that can protect us and fight on our behalf. We become so involved and tired from the battle and before we know it our hearts are hard and abandoned.

What to do with such a heart broken and disappointed and completely engrossed in the lies of the enemy? Return to your fist love. The only way out is to break through the lies of the enemy and allow your heart to once again be taken captive in the love of God. To believe in His love for you. When you find that place of love and acceptance He can once again bring you the comfort that you need and surround you with His embrace.

Your circumstances might not change, and your struggles might still be there, but you will not be alone in your fight. When you lose sight of His love you lose hope but when you return to His love, He can do miracles on your behalf.
It is such a subtle way of attack because it is not doubting God’s existence but rather His love for you.

God is sovereign and we are His bride. We might not understand His ways and we might not know when relief or deliverance will come but when we rest in His love, we find the strength to endure.

So, does He love you? Yes, His love for you never goes away. The challenge is to stay close to His love even through the toughest of days so that He can bring you into a place of safety and rest in the midst of the storm.

There is no place on earth where I feel safer and more protected than when I allow Jacque’s love to penetrate my heart and his arms to enfold me. This is a very real illustration also of our Heavenly Father – when we allow our hearts to once again believe in His love for us then we can find our rest in Him and be free from the yoke of the struggle. Even if the struggle is continuing, when His love is real for us, we have renewed strength.